3 Midgets Of Varying Height Walk Into A Bar…..

and sit down to order their drinks.  The bartender approaches the tallest midget, “What’ll ya have?”

“I’ll have a vodka tonic.”

The bartender turns to the middle-sized midget.

“I’ll have a rum and coke.”

The bartender then turns to the smallest midget.

“I’ll have a mojito.”

The tallest midget spins around on his bar stool and gives the smallest midget a questioning look.

“What? I enjoy the smooth and fruity taste of a mojito.”

The tallest midget pauses for a second than nods his head, “That is understandable, I no longer believe that is an odd choice.”

The middle-sized midget also nods his head in agreement, “Same here I understand your choice and no longer disagree with it.”

The midgets finish their drinks and head home.  The End.

Unsatisfying isn’t it?  I just finished a book that left me with that same feeling.  It had a premise that caught my attention & interesting characters that I wanted to follow, but I followed them for several miles & realized they weren’t really going anywhere.  When I finished the book I realized all that potential had been squandered and I had wasted a week’s worth of reading.

Now I’m not going to say what the book was because it is quite possible someone else might like it and I don’t want to turn anyone away.  Yet I think it just reiterates how hard it is to write a quality novel.  It’s not enough to have a great idea if you’re incapable of translating it from your mind to the paper.  Having great characters doesn’t do your story any good if they don’t have anything to do.  And just as importantly you have to know when to end your story and how to get to that ending at just the right time.

There is a reason why only a handful of people who put pin to paper end up being successful writers.

This post was originally published on The Dark Globe blog.  I contribute there along with a lot of other great writers, so if you get a chance check it out!

Follow me on twitter @TheTAWilliams



Filed under Writing

12 responses to “3 Midgets Of Varying Height Walk Into A Bar…..

  1. reminds me of “the Simpsons” when they censored Itchy and Scratchy, so all they could do was sit on the porch and drink lemonade. I’m going through and editing my novel (again). Maybe it will be done before I retire? : )

  2. Great post, although fortunately I don’t often read anything where the characters are left with no direction but am quite sure those books exist….and yes, I was totally disappointed we never got a punchline on the midget joke 😉

  3. I read one like this last year. The beginning and middle were amazing, but the ending was so horrible, I had the impression that the author just wanted to get it over with, like they got sick of the book, stopped caring, and published it anyways. I couldn’t understand why they’d invest SOOO much time on the characters, only to end it the way that they did. A very angry WTF moment, but it did cause me to look at my own book with a critical eye. I decided to do some rewrites because of this experience.

  4. Sometimes when stories leave you hanging, you can’t help but – hay do you like waffles?

  5. Just wanted to let you know that I have nominated you for the Versatile Blogger Award! Congratulations … information and rules can be found here: http://www.ashmp.wordpress.com

  6. Every time I read a sub-par novel I get a little hopeful that mine will be published, too.

    • You’re a glass is half-full kinda gal!
      I read a sub-par novel, run outside in the rain, fall down on my knees, turn to the heavens, and scream in anguish b/c that book was published over mine. Kinda the same…………I guess……

      • yes, hopefully there is hope for us all. Actually, thank you so much for this post! It got me to thinking about my novel. I have a bunch of disconnected things, and BAM! it hit me. They need to be headed in a direction, so they aren’t like Seinfeld characters, a “show about nothing”. Not that I don’t like Seinfeld, it just makes for a bad novel. (Jerry’s voice) “What’s up with that?” : )

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